JRthefarmer - 5/19/2017 08:27

Well, I do have strong convictions on this because of my faith, but I'll try to leave that aside. As a background, me and my wife lived together for a little while before getting married, which we would both say now was probably a mistake.

Now, it's' easy to get all caught up in the ideas and reasons why a "test run" would be a good thing. But think logically about what you are doing. There isn't really a "test run" at marriage. You either are or aren't. If you aren't there doesn't need to be a serious commitment and therefore no real reason to work through difficult issues or put up with some things because it's an easy split if things aren't rosy. I know the "get with the times" or whatever crowd is highly critical of the idea of being old fashioned, but that doesn't mean it is wrong or a worse idea, just like many things in culture today.

Money is usually one of the main reasons given, but in reality, it's more an excuse. Her expensive apartment really isn't that expensive in the long run, so I would steer you from the money argument as a reason. If you want to pretend marriage, then pretend. What's the point in worrying about splitting all these stupid bills if you want to pretend you are being married? In the long run, money is the least of your problems. Knowing that you two want to commit to each other for life should be the main concern and I don't thing living together really sheds much light on the subject. There are going to be things you don't like. There are going to be things she doesn't like and so on. You either decide you are committed or not. You can do that without all the complications of living together.