Posted 11/24/2023 11:12 (#10494953 - in reply to #10494800) Subject: RE: Family tension
Thumb of Michigan
IF (the big word) you plan on buying out your siblings, then have the discussion(s) and put things into place today (soon).
Your parents could put valuation(s) at today’s (or when relationship went off the track) value. As has been mentioned by others.
Your parents could set up so if there are any payments remaining, that they go to their son, then grandkids.
Always remember you nor your parents will be able to ‘change’ your brother or anyone else.
Also keep this in mind: Mom’s generally like to have ‘happy holidays’, but it may be difficult for parents to ever ‘give up the hope’ that they will someday have a better relationship with your brother & his family. Remembering who Dad lies next to every night (happy wife, happy life).
Remember equal and equitable are not the same words.
These decisions most likely will not be easy for your parents AND it is often it seems easier to ignore the problem/situation, while kicking the can down the road.
It should be pointed out to your parents that they would not be closing the door on the future chance of having a more normal relationship with your brother and his family IF they put something in place today. While IF your SIL changes, they can change things too.
I feel for your parents, if I didn’t see my grandkids on a regular basis…………. I can’t imagine it, let alone how my better half would feel. My four-year-old grandson couldn’t wait to give me the old draw around the hand turkey he made, last week. He wrote down on the drawing that he was most thankful for: Grandpa.