+1 And even though sometimes people come to me for help in these situations it doesn't take long for me to realize that most of the time their situation is beyond my ability to help and I have to refer them to someone better and more thoroughly trained than I am. A minister might be a place to start but unless he has had specific training in marital counseling you'd be better off getting him to refer you to a professional. Preferably, she would go with you, but if not, go by yourself. As an earlier poster said, you have to save yourself whether you can save her and the marriage or not. A good counselor will help to determine WHY she wants a divorce and that is the first step to fixing the problem, provided it can be fixed. And don't just go to the first counselor listed in the phone book. Talk to a minister or someone who has been through the process before and get a good recommendation. Not everyone with letters behind their name is good at what they do. But start the process NOW and in person.