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| Oh where to begin.... I guess first is to learn patience!
Whenever I hear 'Hard to Love' I think of my husband. The song fits him to a 'T'. During spring and fall, I don't expect much out of him. I work full time out of the home, so during that time, I 'try' to do it all. I don't always succeed, but hey, I tried. We have two children so it does get difficult/frustrating when he is not spending time with them. Before kids, I tried to spend time with him in the tractor or combine. I find it fun and can now drive the combine and run a grain cart. Driving a semi is not an option for me. During winter months, he needs to be pulling his fair share in the home. If there are kids, use family/friends on those rain days and go out and do something, anything.
Try learning to do the book work, you can do that while he is gone and then he doesn't have to worry about it. You will have to deal with him trying to teach that to you, which is not fun, but helps a ton in the long run for him. But be understanding when you see large sums of money being spent on something you see as trivial but is needed for him. If he is traveling to go look/buy a new piece of equipment, go with and count the new diner you eat at along the way as a date. When he is a jerk because something went wrong that day, it's ok to be upset because he was short with you that night, but move on the next morning. Be willing to go on a parts run, but let him know that if you have to go on a grocery run he either needs to go too or watch the kids (if there are any). I don't try to fill in his time off with a bunch of stuff, I pick my battles. If there is a small family gathering/reunion for something other than holidays, I let him have quiet time at home while I leave with the kids.
We fight, we get along, we are everything in between. We are not perfect but so far we work. We have been married less than 10 years so there is still a lot to learn. I grew up in a farm family but was not directly involved so it was not a total shock being in this lifestyle, but more than what I ever imagined. I still would not change a thing. It is hard to find other females that understand and that you can vent to without boring them. Who else understands bushels and rainfall??
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How to love a farmer
