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I've been saving this since May because it will take an hour for me to type it and things are just now starting to slow down (I'm out of any thing green to bale).
I run some cows on shares with a yankee and it was past time to wean the calves before both our schedules lined up to work them. We finally set a day that would work for everyone, so the day before (Sunday) I got the corral set up and was walking in the house about 9 pm when I heard the yankee in his pot coming off the highway so every thing is right in the world we can get a good start in the morning. Monday I get to the pot a little after 6 am ( he parks on the county road 1/2 mi north of the house because the road I live on is to narrow/winding to pull a 53' trailer ) the yankee asked if any one around can take a tire off his trailer. He had a blowout on an inside tire and just wanted to pull the tire off, bolt the wheel back on and be on his way. So I make a couple of phone calls and make arrangements to use a neighbors 1" impact to get him on his way after we're done with the cows.
So we set in to gathering cows, witch didn't go as well as planed but we got them caught without anyone getting hot or excited. We split the cows off and got them worked and out of the way then split the calves according to our agreement and penned my calves off to the side. Next we split his calves, some go home with him and he sells some down here. We load his keepers on the pot and run the rest to the local sale barn on my trailer( the corral is is 1/8 mi down in the pasture and you cant get the pot to it so everything comes out in the pickup and trailer we just load the pot in the road ).
Now before we left we penned my calves off to the side so some loggers I've got working on the same farm could get out if one of them cut there leg off or something, the only way out is through the corral. When we get back from the sale barn we run the pot to the neighbors to tackle the tire which could not have gone any better, and get the pot headed north around 12:30.
So the kid I had helping and I go home to eat a sandwich and get back to the corral about 1:45 pm to see a bunch of calves with there tongues hanging out and some laying on there side ( it was only 80* but we gathered them before they drank that morning ) so in a panic we get the gaits open and move some panels so the calves can get to water but they all run to the shade instead. I start driving them to the water 2-3 at a time but one bull calf wont cooperate and keeps running back to the shade. Finally I get down to the last 2 (one was the calf that ran past me 4-5 times) and when we stepped out of the shade one calf just collapsed and the other SOB plowed into me. So I'm trying to get the down calf up but he wouldn't move and I send the kid helping after a hotshot before he got back I slapped the calf on the back and told him " just lay there and die dammit", so the kid gets back we get the calf up, he drinks and we just let them set and cool off for a few minutes.
If your still reading this I promise it's about to get to the good part.
So we work the calves and that SOB that plowed me down came out of the chute and tried getting me again ( at this point I may not have been in the best mood) I made the kid helping get out of the corral ( I'm afraid of his mother) so I finish up by myself. Now it's almost 3 pm all that's left to do is load the calves and get them to the house. I back the trailer and start to load when I see two deputy sheriffs walking down the hill. Now did I mention that I may not have been my normal pleasant self, I assumed one of the urban neighbors called the law because of the pot (that had been gone for 4 hours) setting on the road all night. When the deputy's get to the corral I ask if I could help them, they wanted to know if we had cell phones. Well it's 2012 everyone has a phone what do you want I holler( I never quit loading calves the whole time they where there). So they ask what our phone numbers were. I gave them mine and they said that I was who they were looking for. They wanted to know if I had called 911 I said no I hadn't, then they ask if I had told anyone "just lay there and die dammit" I admitted I'd probably said much worse while working the calves. So while telling about getting run over by my favorite calf I got my phone out and sure enough there it was a call to 999 at 2:09 pm which will apparently go to the next county to the west 911 dispatch.
When they figured out I was a resident of another county they turned it over to them( the county I live in) and they tried to call my cell phone which never works on this pasture so they sent the deputy's to my house (with lights and sirens blaring). Thankfully my wife wasn't home, so they traced my cell phone to the corral.
So after I convinced them that I hadn't axe murdered any one I had the calves loaded I offered them a ride to the gait they said no that they would walk, so I took off up the hill only to see there car setting in the gait with the hood up because they overheated it in there man hunt. I had to take a panel down beside the gait I use for wide equipment to get out and the calves to the house.
If you've read all this I guess the moral to the story is if your going to kill someone down here and you screw up so bad that they call they law before you get the job done, you've got about an hour to work with before the anyone can find you!
Crap it took 2 1/2 hours to type this I hope it gives some of you a little relief from the dry weather. | |
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Best cow working story ever.
