Your wife might be best at home.  You have to be the man and make the judgement call here.  My Bible tells me to be considerate of others.

The 16 year old.  I would read the riot act and tell her to stop being so selfish.  I have told mine, age 11 and 12, that when they are 18 I will galdly let them pick out the 2 biggest suitcases for them to fill and then I will carry them to the end of the driveway for them and tell them goodbye. 

Do you raise children or raise adults?