I haven't seen a little kid yet at a funeral who seemed to grasp the goings on........and I have seen adults who have made stupid statements to the little kids, with the kid kinda having that "WTF??" look on their face......

"Oh, I just know you're going to miss XXXXX"

"I bet you've already cried your eyes out."

etc etc.

And.........I don't fault the adults for the behavior.

The behavior is .........stupid.............but I don't believe the people are........

I think a lot of the problem is just the situation........the moment, the lack of experience on most people's part in dealing with that type of situation, the inherent belief that something must be said, but who the hxxxlll knows what should be said to the listener at that moment in time........what will be best accepted, and what would not.

What causes me to be so insightful???

'cause it happens to me.

I have NEVER been one who has been tongue-tied, at a loss for words, etc etc.........ever since grade school.........never made a difference as to the situation.........in fact, some would call that being "mouthy".

AND............

a close family friend, a vet............lost their son to cancer when he was in his late teens.

My boys played ball with him, the vet was a client so I knew more about his intimate affairs than most.........socialized with them, etc etc etc.

And the night of the visitation.......I shook hands with him in the infamous "line".........and couldn't say a word.

I could not get anything to come out.  Had I kept trying, I would have broken down like a baby.  All I could do was nod.

Fortunately for me he was the stouter man..........and nodded and allowed me to move on.

Obviously I have never forgotten that, and that was a looonnnng time ago.

I dont expect more out of people than I expect of myself...........and I dont handle funerals and hospitals very well.............resultantly, why would anyone else?

I dont like to see little kids get hurt unnecessarily.........just a thing with me.

Wouldnt bother me to put a bullet in a child abuser.........let me be judge for the day..........lowest form of humanity on God's green earth.

So..........I just dont see a lot of upside in putting little kids through it.

9, 10 +++ .........probably.......they are getting "socialized" at that point, and probably have some resilience against the stupidity (or maybe "lack of adeptness"??) of people.