Lac qui Parle County Minnesota | Lost my wife almost 9 years ago when she was only 47 after a 10 month battle with pancreatic cancer. Very tough losing your best friend.
It takes awhile. But it will get more tolerable. I used to say that it gets better, but that doesn’t really fit. I was fortunate that I had a great core of family, friends, and church.
I never really got angry at God, which my pastor said was okay, God has big shoulders. But I do have a lot of questions that I hope he will answer some day.
As far as advice, take care of yourself. Seeing a professional counselor helped me. Eating right and going on walks helps. You’re going through a lot and your body builds up a lot of hormones and toxins. Three ways to get rid of them is cry it out, sweat it out, pee it out (but not with alcohol).
Keep a normal routine. There’s nothing wrong with getting a prescription to help you sleep. If you do wake up with your mind going a thousand miles an hour, don’t lie there, but get out of bed and do something boring. Don’t be afraid of family discussions to discuss how you are feeling.
One big thing you will notice, is that many people won’t know how to deal with you and your loss. They’ll avoid you, or try to stammer out explanations or reasons for her passing. The worse is when they say, “it is God’s will” which isn’t true. Don’t be afraid to stop people from talking themselves into a hole. Just tell them thanks for thinking of you and your family.
For me, thinks did change to make life good again. I did meet a wonderful woman and we have been married for 5 years now.
It’s a lot to deal with, and remember seeking help doesn’t make you less of a person. |
My best friend died Nov 6
