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Madison Co. Virginia | Usually just the funeral. The family of the deceased are usually good friends already, so I'd rather leave visiting with them for a less emotionally-charged event than the visitation. Besides, I'm never sure what to say to a grieving person at an event like that. Conversing with them a few weeks later seems less overwhelming altogether, and gives us a chance to share memories of the deceased.
The funeral is well-worth attending. It's a chance to see far-flung acquaintances at the meal afterward, the sermon and tribute are thought-provoking, and the singing is good. To me also, there's something that just feels 'right' about our custom of family and friends filling in the grave as part of the graveside service.
A good friend of mine was 72 years old, and still working hard; I had shoveled a lot of dirt and gravel for him over the years, since he was a mason in need of occasional assistance, and I was a farm boy with a strong back. The last time I saw him, we were standing in 10 inches of snow, on his new spec house jobsite, watching a brush fire. One week later, I was at his funeral. Those couple shovelfuls of dirt in his grave were some of the hardest shovelfuls that I've ever done for him; I didn't want that to happen for another few decades yet. | |
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How Do You Decide On Funeral Service/Visitation?
