AgTalk Home
AgTalk Home
Search Forums | Classifieds (151) | Skins | Language
You are logged in as a guest. ( logon | register )

Finances between you and your spouse or sig other, or family members?
View previous thread :: View next thread
   Forums List -> AgTalk CafeMessage format
 
sand85
Posted 2/8/2019 23:02 (#7307935 - in reply to #7307444)
Subject: RE: Finances between you and your spouse or sig other, or family members?


C IL		I expect my spouse to make a 100% effort in contributing to our marriage. We don’t have kids so staying home to watch kids isn’t a way she can contribute. So realistically I expect her to contribute to the best of her ability. No kids, she doesn’t want to farm, she doesn’t want to be a homemaker, so there is the job market.

Trying to make things equal in result (money, effort, whatever) seems like a terrible idea. Trying to make things equal in effort (putting in 100%) seems like a good idea. How you work that out is up to you. It’s not the 50’s anymore, so I don’t think it is unrealistic to expect a woman to work outside the home. I also don’t think it is unreasonable to have one income and have a spouse at home.

I’ve put in way more family income than my wife some years, about the same some years, and one year she quit a tough job and sat out the full-time job market for a year because that is what was best for our overall marriage, but she still worked part-time and tried to do more things around the house with her extra time.

My wife unfortunately has zero interest in the farm, so I treat it as a business I own and take a constant family living draw out of it - so farm and personal assets are separate. What we do with our personal assets is our money, but I don’t raid the farm account for random personal cash.

Most of what I personally built up before we got married is in my name in farm assets and some financial accounts, and most of what my wife built up before we got married is in her name in her financial accounts. We went to a joint account after getting married for personal shared money for family living and we each have put away some additional retirement money in new (albeit individual) accounts since getting married. (Edit to add: all our accounts but IRA’s are now joint accounts but I don’t raid her savings/investment account and she doesn’t raid the farm business accounts, so we treat them as separate as a practical matter).

If I was in a situation such as you describe, I would suggest a similar approach - keep business assets separate from personal family living assets, and don’t spend business assets on personal items. But the family living cash you earn/draw should be joint cash unless you and the spouse have made a different arrangement.

Also, if I was in a marry-late-in-life situation I suppose I would have a serious conversion with my partner-to-be about how to handle each person’s existing nest egg. Maybe that is too clinical but it seems like it is just a different situation than working together to make a life and a family for the 30 years until you get there. It just seems different when you each enter with half a lifetime’s money, rather than entering from scratch.








Edited by sand85 2/8/2019 23:19
Top of the page Bottom of the page


Jump to forum :
Search this forum
Printer friendly version
E-mail a link to this thread

(Delete cookies)