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Old sayings questions
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cottonhauler
Posted 11/30/2013 19:54 (#3481787)
Subject: Old sayings questions


Zabcikville, TX		I remember a few old sayings from my grandparents. My dad's mom used to say "use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without". Makes sense to me! I also remember my moms mom saying (for someone who talks a lot) "she/he could talk a clapperboard up a gooses a$$", still have no idea what that means. What are some sayings from the "old days" that you all remember?
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m3farmer
Posted 11/30/2013 20:06 (#3481812 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



SW Minnesota, Lyon County		"Don't have a pot to p**s in or a window to throw it out of" "If I had that 'whatever' and he had a feather up his arse, we'd both be tickled" Many others that I can't think of right now.
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John Smith
Posted 11/30/2013 20:18 (#3481845 - in reply to #3481812)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


South Central Illinois

The pot is a reference to the days when leather was tanned with what went in the pot.

The contents of the pot could be sold for income when there was no other income.

That would depend on having the pot to start with.

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Old Pokey
Posted 11/30/2013 20:35 (#3481881 - in reply to #3481845)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


John Smith - 11/30/2013 17:18

The pot is a reference to the days when leather was tanned with what went in the pot.

The contents of the pot could be sold for income when there was no other income.

That would depend on having the pot to start with.

 Yep, I just learned that one as I am getting into leathercraft. I thought it was very interesting to learn what that meant after hearing it for about 40 years.

 I bought some leather today in fact. I called ahead to ask where their leather was from. Missouri. The seller said some leather that comes from 3rd world countries can still be urine tanned, and that it does stink when wet.

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Mad Max Perf
Posted 12/1/2013 17:10 (#3483677 - in reply to #3481881)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



North Western Alberta		"Slicker than a silk worms tit" "Uglier than 100 miles of gravel road" "one fry short of a happy meal" " Three gallons of crazy in a two gallon bucket"
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Nate B.
Posted 12/1/2013 07:43 (#3482566 - in reply to #3481845)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Bremen, KS		Hmmmm, here I thought the "pot" referred to a bed pan. Learn something again!
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John Smith
Posted 12/1/2013 07:58 (#3482589 - in reply to #3482566)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


South Central Illinois

P*** Poor is a reference to someone who is so poor that they make a living selling what is in the pot.

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povertypoint
Posted 11/30/2013 20:12 (#3481825 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


SE SD		Mom's favorite "don't go up the stairs empty handed" and
"put on clean underwear, incase your in an accident" wouldn't it be needed after the accident?
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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 20:19 (#3481847 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		If you play with it it will fall off
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Midnight Rider
Posted 11/30/2013 20:25 (#3481861 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


NW MO		People in hell want ice water too.
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Mark (EC,IN)
Posted 11/30/2013 20:26 (#3481865 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



Schlegel Farms, Hagerstown Indiana		Every time I see Obama on the TV, I think of one my dad always said "I'd like to buy him for what he's worth and sell him for what he thinks he's worth".



Here's a link to the meaning of several.

http://www2.ljworld.com/weblogs/friday-the-13th-stay-home-go-out-or...


.

Edited by Mark (EC,IN) 11/30/2013 20:27
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NEIndiana
Posted 11/30/2013 20:39 (#3481891 - in reply to #3481865)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Columbia City, Indiana		My Grandpa has so many like that I probably couldn't list them all. For instance, say I'm working trying to turn a wrench on a lug nut or something like that, he can be counted on to say "Don't pop a buggy washer." Or if he's referring to something that you will really like, he'll say "That'll make you come to your milk." When he would see my dog doing his business in the driveway, he would say "Lookit that boy $h!t like a goose!"

If I think of more I'll post them.
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pauperspassion
Posted 11/30/2013 20:41 (#3481898 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


S.E. MN		Three sayings /phrases come to mind that I tend to reference when dealing with people. No play em game, no make em rules. Don't throw stones from a glass house. And finally, be prepared to sleep in the bed you've made. When getting the better than thou lecture I just remember these phrases and tend to judge as to how the person really stacks up.
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brud
Posted 11/30/2013 20:42 (#3481904 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


NCIN		If you hang out with the dogs you're gonna get fleas..
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SOILcattleman
Posted 11/30/2013 20:50 (#3481916 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


West Salem, Illinois		In reference to a heavy rain "Like a cow piss'n on a flat rock"

"Handier than a pocket on a shirt" "Finer than frog hair split three ways" "Neater than a skeeters peter" To something that is really good, any of the three I have heard and said myself.

"Never trust a skinny cook" that one was one of my Great Grandmas favorites

"I may not always be right, but I am never wrong" my Grandpa


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Little Joe
Posted 11/30/2013 20:51 (#3481919 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: DAD always said


small town Iowa....		"Watch the pennies, the dollars will take care of themselves".
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SFO
Posted 11/30/2013 21:14 (#3481975 - in reply to #3481919)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Findlay, Ohio		That's a good one and a lot of truth.
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billybob
Posted 11/30/2013 21:40 (#3482057 - in reply to #3481919)
Subject: RE: DAD always said


68340

If you take care of the little things the big things will take care of themselves.   Dad

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XIX
Posted 11/30/2013 21:52 (#3482094 - in reply to #3482057)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


If ifs and buts were candy and nuts it'd be Christmas all year long.
If you'd work a little smarter you wouldn't have to work so hard.
If you bought it at an auction, you paid more than everyone else thought it was worth.

Some I grew up with....
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School Of Hard Knock
Posted 12/2/2013 13:23 (#3485834 - in reply to #3481919)
Subject: RE: DAD always said


just a tish NE of central ND
Little Joe - 11/30/2013 19:51

"Watch the pennies, the dollars will take care of themselves".
Not always true... the same guy will spend a dollar to chase a nickel.
Just saying.
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RJG
Posted 11/30/2013 20:57 (#3481936 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Galva, IL----- Half way between Peoria & Moline		'If you can't run with the big dogs, stay on the porch. ' ' If it ain't broke, don't fix it. ' ' Cross yer eyes, they might stay that way.' ' When it rains, it pours.' You are what you eat.'
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Southern Farmer
Posted 11/30/2013 20:57 (#3481939 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



West Texas		He'll spend a dollar to save a nickel
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1000 moline
Posted 11/30/2013 21:03 (#3481949 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


South Eastern ,ILL		My dad had 100's of them. Just a few: "if his brains were lard, wouldn't grease a very big pan!"
If something was very snug:" That is tighter than a gnat's a#% ,stretched over a rain barrel."
If some one was extremely frugal : " He so tight he wouldn't pay 10 cents to see a p*#% ant
eat a bale of hay!" My favorite, Someone seeking advice: "Two heads are better than one,
even if one is a jug head!" LOL
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cornstalk5
Posted 12/1/2013 16:01 (#3483527 - in reply to #3481949)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


ECIL		I heard an old man say the same thing except he said "even if one is cabbage."
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Old Pokey
Posted 11/30/2013 21:05 (#3481953 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


 If it aint broke, keep fix'n it till it is.

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Thud
Posted 12/1/2013 10:12 (#3482872 - in reply to #3481953)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Near-north Ontario, French River		If a quick fix works .." better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick".
If something works better than you think it would " success is 50% good managment and 50% good luck "
For the cursed " that guys got all kinds of luck, all bad"
If arguing over a tool " possession is 9/10" of the law"
For a drought " dryer than a popcorn fart'
If you need a shovel " where's the Italian backhoe ."
If someone is bragging about their new piece of equipment/tool that you have no use for " I had one of those once but the wheels fell off"

Edited by Thud 12/1/2013 10:18
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jbwfarm
Posted 11/30/2013 21:09 (#3481964 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Northwest Illinois		My favorite is " An empty wagon rattles the loudest."
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frytownfarmer
Posted 11/30/2013 22:11 (#3482135 - in reply to #3481964)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



Frytown, Iowa		Squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Do your best and don't worry about the rest.

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Lil' Hoss
Posted 11/30/2013 21:10 (#3481967 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


NESD		My dad was always saying "The hurrier I go the behinder I get"
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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 21:12 (#3481973 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		I was in the army with a guy that told me "if god didnt want you to play with it he would have put it in the middle of your back"
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crophugger1
Posted 11/30/2013 21:15 (#3481979 - in reply to #3481973)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


NESD		If ya ain't got time to do it right the first time you'll never have time to do it right the second time. The old mans favorite.
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dt4020
Posted 11/30/2013 22:24 (#3482170 - in reply to #3481979)
Subject: Measure Once, keep cutting.


Fairbury, NE (Southeast)		There's never time to do it right but always time to do it over.

You'll never learn any younger.

The Golden Rule: He who has the gold makes the rules.

Better make like milo and head out.



Edited by dt4020 11/30/2013 22:27
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HFR
Posted 12/1/2013 10:25 (#3482896 - in reply to #3482170)
Subject: RE: Measure Once, keep cutting.


Central Minnesota

Milo and head out one I always say make like a sheep herder and get the flock out of  here.

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RSSS
Posted 11/30/2013 21:21 (#3482003 - in reply to #3481973)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



wnw Iroquois county IL		Heavy rain"It's raining cats and dogs" came from the sod houses that had thacht roofs and the heat would go up thru it and the cats and dogs would lay on it to stay warm and when it would rain hard they would slide off. " When the days begin to lengthen winter begins to strengthen". "When the dew is on the grass rain will never come to pass"
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jwoods
Posted 12/1/2013 19:13 (#3484046 - in reply to #3481973)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Paulding County, Ohio		Grandma used to say "Everybody thinks their crow is the blackest"

Dad phrased one to me that we often refer to. "If the hog is going in the right direction, there's no reason to hit him"
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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 21:16 (#3481981 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Not the sharpest tool in the shed
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shoptek
Posted 11/30/2013 21:19 (#3481994 - in reply to #3481981)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



NW IOWA		When us kids would ask dad "why" after he told us something, he always said "Cats for to have kitten britches" don't have a clue what it meant, but it drives the wife crazy when I say that!
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olivetroad
Posted 12/1/2013 07:59 (#3482592 - in reply to #3481994)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Kingdom of Callaway - Fulton, Mo 65251
shoptek - 11/30/2013 21:19

When us kids would ask dad "why" after he told us something, he always said "Cats for to have kitten britches" don't have a clue what it meant, but it drives the wife crazy when I say that!


I always heard this one after someone asked: "What for?" especially if they pronounced it: "What fer?"

Then the response is: "What fer? Cat fur to make kitten britches!"
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FromtheFlats
Posted 11/30/2013 21:18 (#3481991 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


EC IL		Anytime time I broke something or tore something up dad would say "could have been worse could have been me that done it!!" Sometimes I would just get a straight up chewing if I deserved it, but other times it was this!!
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PapaD
Posted 12/1/2013 19:13 (#3484048 - in reply to #3481991)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Eastern iowa		Work on Sunday fix it on Monday.
Black as Toby's butt.
Worthless as the -----s on a boar.

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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 21:18 (#3481992 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Shes built like a brick sh$t house
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Jim in MS
Posted 11/30/2013 21:19 (#3481996 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Useless as tits on a boar hog
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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 21:20 (#3482001 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		As worthless as t! t$ on a boar hog
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Fayette Farmer
Posted 11/30/2013 21:23 (#3482011 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Southwest Central, Ohio		Farmer tight = tighten till it breaks , back off half a turn
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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 21:23 (#3482012 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Busier than a two peckerd billy goat
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sharecropper
Posted 11/30/2013 21:34 (#3482039 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


southern tip Illinois		Plant your wheat in dust your bins will bust plant your wheat in mud bins will rust. When I got done planting wheat this year I ordered paint, pretty muddy.
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lincmercguy
Posted 11/30/2013 21:40 (#3482055 - in reply to #3482039)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


CO, NE
sharecropper - 11/30/2013 19:34

Plant your wheat in dust your bins will bust plant your wheat in mud bins will rust. When I got done planting wheat this year I ordered paint, pretty muddy.


I think this really means to plant when it's time, don't wait for moisture. If you wait for moisture, you'll have to wait until it dries out enough to get in the field, then you'll have to get another rain for a proper imbibe. Just my random thought.

Most of my Dad's old sayings would violate board profanity rules. :)
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bpreuss
Posted 12/2/2013 16:19 (#3486070 - in reply to #3482039)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


MN		thats one applies to all crops. never had a bad crop planting into dry dirt when it rains after.. planting into mud is always a gamble
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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 21:36 (#3482042 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		As confused as an amish man in at radio shack
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Ben2013
Posted 11/30/2013 21:38 (#3482048 - in reply to #3482042)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Madder then T-rex trying to do pushups
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proud2Bafarmer
Posted 11/30/2013 21:48 (#3482082 - in reply to #3482048)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Baldwin City, KS		Tighter than dick's hat band. Heard it a lot over the years. Never requested further detail. Always made me chuckle.
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jdm
Posted 11/30/2013 21:49 (#3482090 - in reply to #3482082)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


West Kentucky		You can't get finished before you get started.
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MAGNUM 1944
Posted 11/30/2013 21:49 (#3482088 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Busier than a one legged man in a ass kicking contest. Save your money and when you die you'll have something.
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DarrellS
Posted 11/30/2013 22:04 (#3482119 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Louise, TX		Grandpa's saying: CAN'T NEVER COULD DO ANYTHING
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earnhart sil
Posted 11/30/2013 22:08 (#3482131 - in reply to #3482119)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



southern il.		That smells like a barrel full of but holes.
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boa628
Posted 12/1/2013 23:32 (#3484901 - in reply to #3482119)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


SWOH		Ours is close to that....can't never did nuthin'.

Squeakin' like a chicken in heat.
Useless as tits on a boar hog.
Happier than a puppy with two peters.


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bugeater
Posted 11/30/2013 22:17 (#3482150 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Monkey see Monkey do
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jd9600
Posted 11/30/2013 22:22 (#3482167 - in reply to #3482150)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


ecsd		If it weren't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all.
He's not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree.
Sweating like a pregnant nun.
Don't put all of your eggs in one basket.
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bellyacre
Posted 11/30/2013 22:21 (#3482161 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


SWMN		" A nickels worth of common sense will buy a dollars worth of luck
" Ain't got brains enough to pour piss out of a boot"
"if brains were dynamite he couldn't blow his nose"
"its so quiet today you could hear a pigeon fart"
" Mechanic ? He couldn't fix a sandwich if someone buttered his bread"
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sam i am
Posted 11/30/2013 22:26 (#3482178 - in reply to #3482161)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Broome County NY		busier than a cat covering sh.. on a marble floor
dumber then ben butlers bitch jumped in the river to get out of the rain
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Rusty6
Posted 11/30/2013 23:21 (#3482290 - in reply to #3482178)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


S.E. Sask.

sam i am - 11/30/2013 20:26 busier than a cat covering sh.. on a marble floor dumber then ben butlers bitch jumped in the river to get out of the rain


We had a similar version here. Busier than a cat covering $hit on a tin roof.
Or if something smelled really bad it would " drive a buzzard off a gut wagon"
The old timers had lots of those old sayings.  .   

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RSSS
Posted 11/30/2013 22:26 (#3482181 - in reply to #3482161)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



wnw Iroquois county IL		drier than a popcorn fart
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blane
Posted 12/1/2013 16:17 (#3483557 - in reply to #3482161)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



northwest Indiana		" Ain't got brains enough to pour piss out of a boot" with instructions printed on the heel.
"good enough for government work"

Edited by blane 12/1/2013 16:28
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cdm975
Posted 11/30/2013 22:24 (#3482169 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Manitoba, Canada		Buddy has one. " it's harder than try to herd a bunch of cats". Lol
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RSSS
Posted 11/30/2013 22:33 (#3482192 - in reply to #3482169)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



wnw Iroquois county IL		Measure twice, cut once
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Wicksfield
Posted 12/1/2013 08:17 (#3482627 - in reply to #3482192)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


NCIN		The second mouse gets the cheese.
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senorthdakota
Posted 11/30/2013 22:35 (#3482199 - in reply to #3482169)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Had a old neighbor who I asked why he never got married he said sonny! I felt I was better to want something I didn't have then to have something I didn't want!! That was priceless.
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ECIAfarmer
Posted 11/30/2013 22:49 (#3482229 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


East Central Ia, S. Waterloo		I've never seen but always thought there should be a book of these.
My contribution: Even a blind pig finds an acorn now and then.
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yongfarmer89
Posted 11/30/2013 23:13 (#3482276 - in reply to #3482229)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


whitesville new york		Early bird gets the worm

Dumber than a box of rocks

Keep it simple stupid
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ndred
Posted 11/30/2013 23:21 (#3482289 - in reply to #3482229)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


s nd		Quit crying, or I'll give you something to cry about. What are your waiting for,,,,Christmas? Shut the door,, were you born in a barn Colder than a witches ti_. Dumber than a box of rocks. Pretty as a picture. Uglier than a mud fence. You can sleep when you're dead. Slick as a whistle. Hard as a rock. Til the cows come home.


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Fred
Posted 11/30/2013 23:18 (#3482283 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


south east SD		Your brain is so small, you could shove it up an ants ass and it would rattle like a bb in a box car!

Tougher than percolated owl ****.

Hotter than a 2 peckered Billy goat.
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farmer45
Posted 11/30/2013 23:23 (#3482292 - in reply to #3482283)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Washington Co Ks		My grandmother would say about someone who talked a lot about themselves "He/she spells his/her name with a big I and a little u(you)."
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Fred
Posted 12/1/2013 13:58 (#3483316 - in reply to #3482283)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


south east SD		It's so cold you freeze the balls off a...............pool table! As told by our weather man on TV one night, late 60's or 70's. He was known to have a drink or two. Didn't get fired as they would today, might of gotten a talked to about it. He all so held up a framed set of balls one cold night and said, yep there brass alright?
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TSBFarms
Posted 11/30/2013 23:21 (#3482287 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


NC Iowa		"You got to start planting early if your going to plant twice"
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Spincat
Posted 11/30/2013 23:47 (#3482326 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


North Central Kansas		"There's more corn in a crooked row,"

A watched pot never boils

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

My Dad told me many times. " 90 % of all things broken are
broken the first time they are used."

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blue collar
Posted 11/30/2013 23:48 (#3482328 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Manitoba		a rolling stone gathers no moss,
tripping over dollars reaching for dimes,
when everyone walks you run and when they run you walk,
if you think its hard to keep up with the jones' how would you like to be the jones'?
beauty is only skin deep but ugly goes right to the bone


one for market talk that no one has mentioned.....pigs get slaughtered!!
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BigNorsk
Posted 12/1/2013 01:37 (#3482371 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Rolla, ND		Can't swing a dead cat without hitting a....
All dressed up and nowhere to go.
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (from The Shining)
There you go then.
Know which side your bread is buttered on.
Rising tide lifts all boats.
Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining.
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sag0330
Posted 12/1/2013 02:35 (#3482382 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


WC IA		If your not in bed by ten O'clock, you might as well just go home
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Boone & Crockett
Posted 12/1/2013 04:08 (#3482397 - in reply to #3482382)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Colder than a mother-in-laws kiss! Cold nuff to freeze the nuts off a bridge.
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j Feces
Posted 12/1/2013 05:54 (#3482436 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


SW Ont		Brother in laws way to live life, "hold her to the floor till it shakes then back er off just a little". About being prepared," it's like a hard@n, better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it". Henry Ford quote I believe, "doesn't matter if you think you can or you can't, your right".
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j Feces
Posted 12/1/2013 05:57 (#3482439 - in reply to #3482436)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


SW Ont		Sorry forgot an important one from my dad. If you asked him why he did something,he would say,"why does a dog lick his balls? Because he can!" Always liked that one.
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datyerdog?
Posted 12/1/2013 06:29 (#3482461 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Dryer than a popcorn fart.
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Brian sepa
Posted 12/1/2013 06:32 (#3482463 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: In reference to boys and their usefullness....



Lancaster County, Pa.

with the work at hand, Dad has said more than once........ "One boy equals one boy, two boys make half a boy, and three boys are no boys at all."

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Mark (EC,IN)
Posted 12/1/2013 08:59 (#3482733 - in reply to #3482463)
Subject: RE: In reference to boys and their usefullness....



Schlegel Farms, Hagerstown Indiana
Brian sepa - 12/1/2013 06:32

with the work at hand, Dad has said more than once........ "One boy equals one boy, two boys make half a boy, and three boys are no boys at all."



I heard that as....one boy does the work of half a man....two boys can do the work of one man....three boys do the work of no men.
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Mrs B
Posted 12/1/2013 09:22 (#3482781 - in reply to #3482463)
Subject: RE: In reference to boys and their usefullness....


Highland Center, in Southeast Iowa

Husband's grandfather had that same saying.  And he had 6 boys!

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DeereTopher
Posted 12/1/2013 06:36 (#3482465 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



north central indiana		My dad could "sell a truck load of snowballs to a group of Eskimos! "
Dad says, and has been told, "that guy would rather climb a tree, and lie, than stand on the ground and tell the truth" always in good fun when directed towards dad:)
Son " I was born at night, but it wasn't last night"
Son "I did'nt just fall of the turnip truck yesterday"

Have a good one,
Deeretopher
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farmer45
Posted 12/1/2013 06:42 (#3482470 - in reply to #3482465)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Washington Co Ks		He will lie when the truth sounds better.
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5 Head
Posted 12/1/2013 06:58 (#3482493 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


South West MN		grandpa spray painted on the inside of a grain bin "in God we trust, all others pay cash"

if you squeezed all of the sh*t out of him he would be transparent

it's manure till you fall in it, then its sh*t
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Russ In Idaho
Posted 12/1/2013 08:05 (#3482607 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


About a guy being a good welder, "that man could weld a snowball to a train track."

About someone who is stupid, "He can't help it, he was double bred stupid."

About a calf with scours, " His ass is a boiling like a tea kettle."

Son there is only two things you use a full stroke on, one is a handsaw, the other you are going to have to figure out for yourself.

It's a piss poor milk cow that can't hold a extra milking.

It's a poor hired man that can't eat his day wages in a day.

You can't stand to pay a hired man standing beside you when you stop to bull**** the neighbor.
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Russ In Idaho
Posted 12/1/2013 08:09 (#3482617 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


About being a liar, "If the truth sounded better, that man would still lie to you."

Also a good welder, " He could weld the crack of Dawn."
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Russ In Idaho
Posted 12/1/2013 08:16 (#3482623 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


I also told this one to my wife in jest the other day, she is a blonde. She was shaking her head at me. "I told her stop that the B's B's in you head are rolling to fast to get them into the game." She replied what the heck are you talking about, I said you remember those little pocket games where you shake them to get the B's to fall into the indentations?

Needless to say, I didn't score any brownie points that day.
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olivetroad
Posted 12/1/2013 08:19 (#3482633 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Kingdom of Callaway - Fulton, Mo 65251		When something was decided to not be worth doing: "not enough sugar for a cent"

When something was a good deal: "that's a lot of sugar for a cent"

Description of someone getting a good buy at a auction: "He could fall in a lagoon and come out smelling like a rose"

Dedcription of someone STEALING something at a auction: "He could fall in a lagoon and come out smelling like a rose with a calf under each arm"

" He can weld broken hearts and the crack of dawn"

"A lesson bought is a lesson taught"

"Don't mind the mules, just keep loading the wagon"

"If it was up your butt with fish hooks you would know where it is"

"Pert nigh, but not plumb" or "close but no cigar" or "half a bubble off"

"It's only as hot as you make it"

"She's older than dirt but still has a calf every year"

"He is really packing the mail"

"Corn as high as an elephant's eye by the fourth of July, and no one around to see it"

"Runs like a striped ass ape - oh so you never saw one? Thats because they run so fast"
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Ken
Posted 12/1/2013 08:25 (#3482642 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


central Ia		As I walked out the door on a weekend night my mom would say "If your not proud enough of what you are doing to have it put in the paper you best not be doing it" told my kids that too
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olivetroad
Posted 12/1/2013 08:26 (#3482646 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Kingdom of Callaway - Fulton, Mo 65251		"A farting horse never tires"

"You can tell he's lying - it is whenever his mouth is moving"

"He lies when the truth sounds better"

"Nothing beats homemade bread"

"I might as well be talking to that fence post"
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j Feces
Posted 12/1/2013 09:40 (#3482816 - in reply to #3482646)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


SW Ont		My version....a farming horse never tires..a farting man is the man to hire.
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forageone97
Posted 12/1/2013 08:33 (#3482670 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


S.E. LA.		My grandmother used to say, "Charity begins at home".
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farmer45
Posted 12/1/2013 08:51 (#3482712 - in reply to #3482670)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Washington Co Ks		Whenever one of us kids did something to the other to get even my mother would say "Two wrongs don't made a right."
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KnowAFarmer
Posted 12/1/2013 14:48 (#3483394 - in reply to #3482712)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



SE Nebraska
"Two wrongs don't made a right."


But three lefts do.
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Nate B.
Posted 12/1/2013 08:53 (#3482718 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Bremen, KS		"Couldn't pour pee out of a boot with instructions on the heel"

"Crazier than a pet raccoon"
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sharecropper
Posted 12/1/2013 09:20 (#3482773 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


southern tip Illinois		He's so old he can remember when the Dead Sea was just sick
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Nate B.
Posted 12/1/2013 21:27 (#3484596 - in reply to #3482773)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Bremen, KS		Close enough for hand shoes and horse grenades.

Everyone's a comedian.

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

Success has many fathers but failure is an orphan.

She's so ugly she'd make a freight train take a mud road.

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Mrs B
Posted 12/1/2013 10:40 (#3482936 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Highland Center, in Southeast Iowa

Tighter'n a fat gal's sock.

When being fed a line of bs:  I've heard bugs fart before.

A very frugal person:  Killed more buffaloes squeezin' his nickles than Bill Cody ever did.

Poor as Job's turkey.  (have no clue where that reference comes from, really doubt Job had a turkey)

Colder'n a well-digger's azz.

There's many many more, but they won't come to mind now.

 

 

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NEIndiana
Posted 12/1/2013 11:05 (#3482978 - in reply to #3482936)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Columbia City, Indiana		"Pigs get fed, hogs get slaughtered."
"Good Lord willin' and the crick don't rise."
"Fair to middlin',"
"If I've told you this story before just sit tight, cause I'd kinda like to hear it again myself."
"Deader'n an it."
"Rougher'n a cob."
"That ain't gonna ride." or "That'll ride."
"Plant in the dust, your bins'll bust. Plant in the mud, the crop's a dud."

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NEIndiana
Posted 12/2/2013 18:43 (#3486347 - in reply to #3482978)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Columbia City, Indiana		Thought of another one my Grandpa says. Whenever he thinks he's going to be proven right about some topic, he says "I'll show you whose ass is the blackest." I have no idea what that refers to, but he is consistent about when he uses it.
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Old Pokey
Posted 12/1/2013 11:16 (#3482997 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


 Dumb as a doorknob.

 So slow I can get out, take a pee, and get back in without taking a step forward.

 Open your wallet and let the moths out.

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tmcalister
Posted 12/1/2013 12:09 (#3483110 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



North Central Texas

Fellows,

BS is an artform in Texas.  We had a next door neighbor (Glen Parker)  that when something turned out less than perfect would say "Well that's close enough.  Anyone looking that close is either looking to fight or buy and the damn thing ain't for sale."   My son gets tired today of hearing me say "Well you know what Mr. Parker used to say."

Hotter than a two story whore house on nickle night.

Colder than a well diggers a$$ in Montana.

He could weld a snowball to a screen door.

He could weld anthing from the crack of dawn to a broken heart.

Thats about as useful as a screen door on a submarine.

Most of them should not be put into print.

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Old Pokey
Posted 12/1/2013 14:14 (#3483344 - in reply to #3483110)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


LOL.

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Kelly
Posted 12/1/2013 12:23 (#3483132 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


NC KS		My maternal grandfather said this in reference to people living together without marrying-"why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free".
We used this one a lot where I used to work-"he could destroy an anvil in a sandpile".
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jd9600
Posted 12/1/2013 12:54 (#3483203 - in reply to #3483132)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


ecsd		What about NAT's favorite saying: "that will buff out". Slicker than snot. Don't let the bed bugs bite.
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John 86
Posted 12/1/2013 15:45 (#3483497 - in reply to #3483132)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Seaforth, Ontario

My wife tells that one with a differnt slant.
Why buy the whole pig when you can get the sausage for free.

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bsmaster
Posted 12/1/2013 14:53 (#3483408 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


half way from STL and Springfield, IL		That dirt is so poor you can't even raise h#ll on it. Mind over matter, if you don't mind it don't matter. That dirt is so light you don't need lights at night. Tighter than a nuns c##t. That's like trying to catch a fart in a whirlwind.
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SFO
Posted 12/1/2013 15:08 (#3483436 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Findlay, Ohio		"Colder than a well diggers ass in Idaho" "If you snooze you lose"
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cowfeeder
Posted 12/1/2013 15:09 (#3483440 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Northwest Iowa		That will go over like a fart in church. If you want to run with the big dogs, you gotta stop pissn like a pup.
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Old Red
Posted 12/1/2013 15:56 (#3483515 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Charing Cross, Ont.		<p>Here's a couple more " A bird in hand is worth more than 2 in the bush" " colder than a witches t$t" " older than dirt" " what goes around, comes around"</p><p>"He's a few bricks short of a load or his elevator doesn't run to the top"</p>

Edited by Old Red 12/1/2013 16:46
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barren
Posted 12/1/2013 15:58 (#3483518 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Glasgow, Ky

Nervous as a whore in church.

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Lizton farmer
Posted 12/1/2013 16:01 (#3483526 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



lizton IN		For a tight fit "fits like a wedding di--. You could tare up an anvil with a rubber hammer.
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RichardCenAr
Posted 12/1/2013 17:19 (#3483697 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Central AR		A guy that use to work for me would say after a very hard rain, "It came a Joe Darter". Never knew who Joe Darter was and neither did he.
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Steve E.C. Illinois
Posted 12/1/2013 17:46 (#3483753 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


Dad use to say "The porch light is on, but nobodies home."
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8130JD
Posted 12/1/2013 18:59 (#3484004 - in reply to #3483753)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



central ILL		Two heads are better than one, even if one is a sheeps head.
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ECIAfarmer
Posted 12/1/2013 18:18 (#3483857 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


East Central Ia, S. Waterloo		He could mess up a junkyard. Never hire a man who wears leather gloves, smokes, and rolls his own.
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AR1920
Posted 12/1/2013 18:26 (#3483885 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


NEMO		"That smell would gag a maggot"
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1755 man
Posted 12/1/2013 18:46 (#3483956 - in reply to #3483885)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Southern IL		Loose lips sinks ships, rain by seven over by 11, like a midget at a urnal I'll be on my toes,
Easier to save it then make it, I cut that wire three times and it's still too short,
Different strokes for different folks
Sometimes you have to sacrifice speed for convenience.




We had an electrician who was full of sayings... Man I miss hearing them.

Edited by 1755 man 12/1/2013 18:46
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Bristol Hillbilly
Posted 12/1/2013 18:43 (#3483943 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



Palestine, IL 62451

" A broken clock is right two times a day."

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Little Duck
Posted 12/1/2013 18:51 (#3483975 - in reply to #3483943)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


South East Illinois		Even a blind squirel finds a nut once in a while.
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Ben2013
Posted 12/1/2013 19:30 (#3484104 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Runs like a raped ape
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Ben2013
Posted 12/1/2013 19:32 (#3484111 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		He could mess up a one car parade
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Ben2013
Posted 12/1/2013 19:33 (#3484116 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		He couldnt find his a$$ with both hands
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260 AR
Posted 12/1/2013 19:43 (#3484148 - in reply to #3484116)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


SE SD		A$$hole over tea kettle. As in "He fell a$$hole over tea kettle in love."
If wishes was horses, then every fool would ride.
If my aunt had balls, she'd be my uncle. No idea what that means.
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Ben2013
Posted 12/1/2013 21:17 (#3484547 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Hotter than a $2 pistol
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Ben2013
Posted 12/1/2013 21:18 (#3484557 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Makes as much sence as a football bat
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Ben2013
Posted 12/1/2013 21:21 (#3484567 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Western, Pa		Makes as much sence as cutting the cum catcher off a condemn
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tillage-director
Posted 12/1/2013 21:37 (#3484639 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



Central MN		My dads favorite " he's goofier than a fruit cake" another old one I like is " he went to the outhouse and the hogs got him" then the classic goofier than a hoot owl
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KnowAFarmer
Posted 12/1/2013 21:38 (#3484644 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



SE Nebraska		Due to budget cuts the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
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FarmerT
Posted 12/1/2013 22:09 (#3484746 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


East Central IL		Confused as a chameleon in a bag of skittles...
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Black Lab
Posted 12/1/2013 22:46 (#3484828 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



n.e. Il.		My grandpa used to say; The easiest way is hard enough.
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boa628
Posted 12/2/2013 00:09 (#3484932 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


SWOH		Better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

Tighter than a nun on Saturday night.

Slicker than goose s**t on a pump handle.

If it looks heavy..."it'll take two men and a small boy to move it".

We've got an old guy that helps us out every now and then and he's got a ton of them and I can't put most of them on here but one of his cleaner ones is if we're working on something and somebody has trouble getting a bolt lined up with a hole or something like that he'll say "you want me to put some hair around it?"

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Proudfamilyfarm
Posted 12/2/2013 01:36 (#3484982 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


Manitoba		Hit the rubarb, reference to hitting the ditch or trees. Does a one legged duck swim in a circle, he's tighter than a frogs @$$ that's water tight. Tighter than two coats of paint, tougher than wale s--t, times are so tough gotta j--k the dog off to milk the cat
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gorpy
Posted 12/2/2013 05:47 (#3485053 - in reply to #3484982)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


SW Ontario		if your really hungry eat the ass hole out of a dead skunk
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Al Swearingen
Posted 12/2/2013 13:12 (#3485820 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


North Central Iowa		Whem making something " good enough to take to the county fair".

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ttop
Posted 12/2/2013 20:56 (#3486831 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions


scky		If a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his a33 when he hopped. The Lord opened a cats eye at 9 days old, but never got around to opening yours/his. Tougher than a pine knot. You need a little willie in you (meaning get a little determination/nerve). Boy if you don't stop crying, I'll give you something to cry about. He could tear up an iron wedge. Cuss like a sailor. All dressed up and nowhere to go.
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Mapman
Posted 12/2/2013 21:29 (#3486956 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: Re: Old sayings questions



NEND		Dads saying while working on the farm in my younger years. "The pay is poor but the company is great!"
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KnowAFarmer
Posted 12/2/2013 21:43 (#3487014 - in reply to #3481787)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions



SE Nebraska		Not really an old saying, but hanging on the wall in the shop.

I know there's no way to do that - but if there WERE a way, what would it be?
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ndred
Posted 12/2/2013 22:03 (#3487083 - in reply to #3487014)
Subject: RE: Old sayings questions


s nd		She could eat the a_ out of a grizzly at fifty yards.
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